So my beloved and I are between jobs and counting dollars, if not pennies. Thanks to my obsessive nature, we're also flush with airline miles and hotel points. And it's cold and rainy in SF right now.
Are our deam jobs going to disappear if we can't interview for them within the next few days? Perhaps more to the point: once we have said jobs, will be be able to take off for a few days in the sun whenever we like?
Didn't think so.
Mission: Use miles and points to get two stir-crazy, soggy adults to someplace warm and beach-y, for free or very very close to it.
It's 3:50 on Friday. Can I do this? Can I do this and get us on a plane this weekend or Monday? Hmmm...
So W and I investigated the consulting thang, and decided it wasn't for us. Maybe next year.
I have two interviews lined up and I only resigned yesterday. Nice ego-boost. I'm being crazy-bold and applying for CTO spots, too. I've got the experience, but I don't have that line on my resume, so it's a long shot. We'll see.
I haven't told either set of parents that I bailed on the gig yet. Talked to W's dad today and felt weird not saying anything, but my folks are out of the country for the next month and I'd rather they didn't worry. It would be nice to spill the news by saying ". . . and I have a new job already!"
I'm feeling a little pressure to get settled into a job thing before we go into a full-on recession. The Cube (aka the ex-job) was supposed to be that spot. But: not so much. At least I've got a much stronger immunity to commuting, pointless meetings, and corporate-speak. (No, seriously. The document I was complaining about last week would have just decimated me in September.)
I'm trying to think of The Cube as some kind of necessary booster shot and move on. Plus they got some good code from me, I left between projects with my stuff well documented, and I wasn't gonna stay for much longer no matter what (. . . is what I keep telling hyperactive sense of responsibility, anyhow.)
My cubicle shelf life is apparently 3 months and 12 days. Who knew?
I'm sad, and relieved, and also feeling what I guess is grief for the career I thought existed for me at that company.
Kind of like when you know a guy is Just No Good, but you've gotten used to imagining your lives together. Dreaming of having children, the house you'd live in, the morning sun on his face?
And then you DTMFA and you know it's Right, and you know you're better off, but those daydreams still make you sad?
It's sort of like that. With more paperwork and no sex.
I've got an interview lined up already, and my actually dreamy husband and I are looking into a consulting thang we maybe could do together.
Whew.
Ok, so the Prozac's working, and my brain feels right again. My job, however, still feels wrong. I've started quietly applying to companies I'd really, really like to work for (companies I think are doing world-changing stuff). And I'm coming up with a strategy for getting out of this job with minimal impact, out of consideration for the handful of people on my team who really do work hard and care about what they do.
I spent half of last week working with a resignation letter at the ready. I was one click away from printing the letter and walking out. W was spending his days half-expecting a "come pick me up, I just quit" call.
I need the patience to get out smoothly, and to have something better lined up.
Gawd. Wish me luck.
I think this is the working-adult equivalent of boring teenage angst, but it's new to me.
I've made it through a decade of writing code for money without having to respond straight-facedly to sentences like these. But... dude. Seriously? Someone wrote these down and they weren't kidding? Even a little?
"Operationalize best in class interactive marketing solutions."
"Empower teams with shared goals."
"Innovate and enrich brand extension products, tools and partners."
"Improve cross-functional alignment of teams and business units."
Yeah. These are all real quotes from a real document with a really unfortunate acronym in the title, having to do with "stuff my company wants to do in 2008". No wonder my throat hurts. It's from the not-screaming all day.
Does it have to be this bad? Do people just build up immunity? Ack!