August 17, 2004

Jesus isn't just made of crackers, he's made of wheat crackers

The kids from South Park said it best:

Sister Anne: Now, let me explain how Communion works. The priest will give
you this round cracker, and he will say, "The Body of Christ," and then you eat it. 
Cartman: Jesus was made of crackers? 
Sister Anne: No. 
Stan: But crackers are his body. 
Sister Anne: Yes. 
Kenny: (What?!) 
Sister Anne: In the Book of Mark, Jesus distributed bread and said, "eat this, for it is my body." 
Cartman: So we won't go to hell as long as we eat crackers. 

But apparently those of us with celiac disease (and yeah, I'm one of the lucky ones) will go to hell. Because Jesus is, according to church doctrine, specifically made of wheat crackers. Just ask the Vatican.

'Scuse me. I'm gonna go watch some more TIVO-ed episodes of Bullshit until my head stops aching.

Posted by Liz at August 17, 2004 09:41 PM
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